Monthly Archives: September 2018

THE CAPTAIN AND THE CHAPLAIN.–

A correspondent with the army of the Cumberland tells the following:

On the morning of our arrival at Strawberry Plains, a Captain on Gen. Sheridan’s staff descried a man dressed in a semi-military garb, common to sutlers and other army followers, riding leisurely along in a dilapidated carriage, drawn by a span of mules. The most remarkable feature about the individual in the carriage, was a Bardolphian proboscis of magnificent proportions and gorgeous colors, at once suggestive of luscious tods and invigorating cordials. The Captain, fatigued and thirsty, taking his cue from the other’s illuminated frontispiece, rode close beside him, and asked, in a confidential tone, if he couldn’t give him a “suck.” “No, sir,” was the reply; “I am not a wet nurse.” “O, but I mean a drink of whiskey; the fact is, I’m devilish dry.” “No, sir, I cannot; I never use intoxicating beverages of any description; therefore, have none.” “But,” persisted the Captain, “have you no friends or acquaintances that you could recommend me to. I’m hankering mightily after a nip.” “No, sir; I do not frequent the society of intemperate men.” “Well,” said the Captain, looking hard at him of the fiery visage and rum-blossomed nose, “perhaps we have both mistaken your calling; are you not a sutler?” “Sutler? no, sir,” returned the now exasperated occupant of the carriage. “I am a follower of the Lord Jesus Christ; the chaplain of the ____Ohio cavalry, and a ____.” The Captain stopped not to hear more, but putting spurs to his horse, left in a twinkling.

Originally posted 2008-10-14 23:35:13.

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A GIRL WORTH HAVING.–

“One of our fair countrywomen,” says a correspondent, “the daughter of a rich and independent farmer of Rockingham, was married, the other day, to a gentleman who may congratulate himself upon having secured a prize worth having. She was what we should call ‘an independent girl,’ sure enough. Her bridal outfit was all made with her own hands, from her beautiful straw hat down to the handsome gaiters upon her feet! Her own delicate hands spun and wove the material of which her wedding dress and travelling cloak were made; so that she had nothing upon her person, when she was married, which was not made by herself! Nor was she compelled by necessity or poverty to make this exhibition of her independence. She did it for the purpose of showing to the world how independent Southern girls are. If this noble girl were not wedded, we should be tempted to publish her name in this connection, so that our bachelor readers might see who of our girls are most to be desired. If she were yet single, and we were to publish her name, her pa’s house would be at once thronged with gallant gentlemen seeking the hand of a woman of such priceless value.” –Richmond Sentinel.

Originally posted 2008-10-13 17:12:18.

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CRUELTIES OF THE WAR.–

Before the rebellion, there resided in Carter County, Tennessee, two families named Hetherley and Tipton, who were on the most intimate and friendly terms. When the troubles came upon the country, the male menbers of the Hetherley family organized a Federal company for home protection, while the Tipton boys espoused the rebel cause, and joined the Confederate army in Virginia. After an absence of a year, the elder Tipton returned to his native county with a Lieutenant’s commission, and a squad of soldiers, and immediately set to work to clear the neighborhood of all the Unionists. Tipton was brutal and unscrupulous in the course he pursued towards his former friends. Learning that one of the Heatherleys was lurking in the vicinity, and failing, after a thorough search, to discover his whereabouts, he took Hetherley’s widowed mother from her house in the night, carried her to an adjoining wood, and putting a rope around her neck, threatened that if she did not instantly reveal her son’s hiding-place he would hang her. This she refused to do, and Tipton, as good as his word, had her suspended to a tree until life was nearly extinct. When she came to, he assured her that unless she told where her son was concealed, he would surely kill her. But the old lady was not to be intimidated, and again and again was she strung up, when Tipton, convinced that he could not wring her secret from her, left her lying on the ground more dead than alive. Heatherley heard of the outrage perpetrated upon his mother, and sent word to Tipton to look out, for the avenger was on his track. That very night, as Tipton was making preparations to leave the country, he was surprised at his father’s house by Hetherley’s company, and taken to the mountains. Here he was compelled to pay the penalty of death for his cruelties. Hetherley, maddened at the cruelties inflicted upon his helpless old mother, had him stripped and bound, made him kneel upon a coffin and take the oath of allegiance to the Federal Government, and then compelled the negro servant to blow his brains out with a revolver.

Originally posted 2008-10-13 01:54:15.

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AN INCIDENT AT GETTYSBURG.–

A surgeon of the Virginia army relates the following incident: “As I was pushing my way through a crowd of idle spectators, at the Second Corps hospital, Gettysburg, one of our wounded, from a North Carolina regiment, called to me in a feeble voice. I went to him, and he said: ‘You are a Confederate surgeon–are you not?’ I answered him, ‘Yes; what can I do for you?’ He caught me nervously by the arm; and in a manner very striking and very eloquent, he uttered: ‘What do you think, doctor? I am wounded and dying in defence of my country, and these people are trying to persuade me to take the oath of allegiance to theirs!’

“The crowd around him scattered as if a bomb had fallen into their midst, whilst I, overcome by the fervent eloquence of his words, could only bow in silence over the gallant fellow, upon whose brow the damp shadow of death was already gathering.

Originally posted 2008-10-11 16:39:44.

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